Catweazle Episode 6 - THE MAGIC FACE ( SCENE BY SCENE)

[michaellevenson]

Carrot and Catweazle are in the ruins of a cottage about a mile from Hexwood Farm, Carrot's home. The cottage is dilapidated with no glass in any of the windows and the downstairs piled high with junk. Catweazle has a mailbag that he's filling up with rubbish that seems to interest him, much to Carrot's puzzlement.
Ct " hurry up, they'll be here soon. We'll get caught, what do you want with all that junk for anyway "
Catweazle picks up a roller skate and is amused by it.
C " see, a chariot for my minion Touchwood "
He takes his pet toad out of his pocket ,
C " Touchwood, thy own chariot, ha ha"
Ct " come on let's go"
C ( noticing battered suitcase) " what's this?"
Ct " you don't want that, it's falling to bits"
C " what is it?"
Ct " a suitcase, you know for travelling "
C ( in awe) " for travelling, back to my own time mayhaps "
Ct " come on , they'll be here any minute now, dad and Mrs Derringer "
A hundred yards away, Carrot's father George Bennett leads Mrs Derringer an American author and photographer, and her English assistant Maud into a clearing in the woods and stop to view the cottage.
GB " there it is"
ED " it's just simply lovely Mr Bennett "
Eleanor Derringer gets her professional looking camera and starts snapping away.
Inside the cottage,
Ct " crumbs, they're here, quick Catweazle lets go"
Geoffrey Bayldon is Catweazle

 

[michaellevenson]

Carrot leaves out the back of the cottage, Catweazle follows carrying his bag of junk , but momentarily pokes his head out of the glassless window.
Eleanor stops taking pictures,
E " did you see him"
Maud " who"
E " there's someone in that house "
George " are you sure"
E " yeah"
G " I'll take a look"
E " did you see him Maud"
M (sighs) " no Eleanor "
G " probably just a tramp "
Eleanor and Maud are an odd couple, not exactly friends, more an employer/ employee relationship, with Maud having to put up with Eleanor and her brash big mouth ways.
G " the place has been empty for years you see so tramps tend to move in"
E " is there a room in there I can use for d and p"
G" d and p?"
M " developing and printing "
G " Mrs. Derringer before you get carried away I really think you should look inside"
E " sure"
They all walk into the cottage.
Marcella Markham and Zulema Dene are Eleanor and Maud.

 

[michaellevenson]

Carrot and Catweazle are walking through the woods ,Catweazle head shaking muttering to himself.
C" oh....people!"
Ct " what's wrong with people "
C " they make my head buzz "
Ct " only because you're not used to them "
C " no, and do not want to be"
Ct " you're used to me though, so what do you think of me?"
C (puzzled) " think of you? But you are there"
Ct " yes but when I'm not there"
C " then I don't think of you"
Ct " you're alone too much, it's not good to be alone "
C " I lived alone in my own time "
Ct " this is you're own time, can't you see that, here and now "
C " here and now is where I am, there and then I want to be"
Ct " but it's a dream Catweazle "
C ( angry) " Nay Nettleface!! This is the dream, and I hope to wake "
Robin Davies is Carrot.

 

[michaellevenson]

Eleanor and Maud live in a huge mansion, it's rented for the summer, belongs to a Sir Henry, abroad this time of year. Maud is outside washing down their car, a two seater open top sports car, Eleanor is in the dark room developing her pictures of the cottage. In one of them is Catweazle , head sticking out of the window.
E ( shouts) " Maud!"
M." What is it"
E " It's him"
M " what's him"
E " I've found him, come and see"
Maud wearily throws down the cleaning cloth and trudges into the house, her employer calling.....again "
Eleanor shows her the photo.
E " it's him Maud, the strange old man with the marvellous face. Right there in the window. Isn't that the greatest face you ever saw. We must remember to take a print with us when we see Mr Bennett. I have a hunch that boy of his knows him."

 

[michaellevenson]

Carrot is in the farmyard at his dad's farm, his home, he is talking to farmhand Sam who is working on their tractor, named Lulu, which has broken down again.
Sam loves F1 motor racing,
S " in France they average over 100, but in Zandfort that's in the Netherlands, it's about 95"
Ct " 95, is that all"
S " yeah, well it's road holding that counts there more than speed"
Ct " bet you'd like to have a go Sam"
S " sure would, oh well I'm stuck here with Lulu"
A car approaching can be heard "
S " hear that Carrot, sounds like a TR6"
Eleanor and Maud drive in ,Eleanor driving.
S " what did I tell you"
Carrot goes over to greet them.
E " Edward isn't it, missed you at the cottage this morning "
Ct " I know "
E " come to see your Pa"
Ct " yes he's expecting you" Carrot looks admiringly at car.
Ct " really super "
E " like it?"
Ct " it's great"
E " guess what"
Eleanor hands Carrot her cottage photos. Carrot glances through them , and stops at the one with Catweazle in it.
E " something wrong?"
Ct " ...er no"
E " who is he?"
Ct " I..I..don't know, I think he's a hermit"
E " a hermit! That's wonderful, do you think you can find him for me?"
Ct " find him?"
E " his face, I must have his face. Would he pose?"
Ct " pose?"
E " I want to take some pictures for my new book"
Ct " ..er..I don't think he'd like that very much"
Sam has wondered over, Carrot knows Sam has spotted Catweazle a few times around the farm and Carrot has denied knowing him, he doesn't want Sam seeing the photo.
Ct " anything you want Sam?"
S " er..no Carrot"
Sam goes back to Lulu the tractor.
E " can you track him down for me"
Ct ....but but..Mrs Derringer "
E " take the photos, show him , they'll help to explain. Tell him I'll be waiting for him anytime "
Eleanor and Maud enter the farmhouse, Sam comes over.
S " what's all that about?"
Ct " nothing "
S " what have you got there "
Ct " just some photos of the cottage "
S " let's have a look"
Ct "I've got to go Sam"
Carrot runs off leaving Sam a bit perplexed.
Bud Tingwell is George Bennett

Neil McCarthy is Sam.

 

[michaellevenson]

Catweazle lives in an old army water tank. A metal structure located in the woods. Now empty of water but makes a secure home for him. Twenty foot high , accessed by a ladder leading up to a bowl shaped top, a hatchway leads down into the interior.

Carrot stands at the foot of the tower, named by Catweazle as Castle Saburac, he whistles then climbs up. Catweazle opens the hatch on top and sticks his head out, angry at Carrot whistling for him.
C " you will spoil everything "
Ct " so will you, look at this."


Catweazle sees the photo and screams and crashes down inside the the tank. Carrot climbs down inside.
C " come no nearer I command thee"
Ct " it's all your fault collecting rubbish "
Catweazle agitated in the extreme,
C " I am lost, lost ......doomed doomed Catweazle "
Ct " what's the matter now"
C " thy cunning treacherous fox. Thy knowest thou has my face my image. I must obey thy every command "
Ct "you mean you think anyone that's got a picture of you can make you do anything they like"
C " see I am in your hands "
Ct " oh ...you better have yourself back then"
Carrot hand Catweazle the photos.
C " ah thank you"
Catweazle tears up photos.
Ct " what are you doing "
C " I am free"
Ct " you silly old idiot, that's no good, Mrs Derringer has the negative "
C " negative?"
Ct " the original, the first one , she can make as many copies of that picture as she likes"
C ( glumly) " then I must go to her. Come Touchwood ( picks up toad) if she has my image then I am her slave"
Ct " course you're not, she's only a photographer. You can't go, anyway how will you find her?"
C " how does the rabbit find the snare"
Catweazle climbs up to hatch dejectedly.

 

[michaellevenson]

Eleanor and Maud leave farm, George sees them back to the car.
G " I'll let you know when the contracts have been drawn up "
E " a real English cottage, I'm so thrilled, aren't you thrilled too Maud"
M ( sighs) " yeah, thrilled "
A little later Catweazle comes to the road running through the middle of the woods. He stands there looking glum and accepting his fate. Eleanor and Maud drive along road.
E " I don't believe it it's him"
M." I don't like the look of him"
E " don't be a fool Maud he's a real find"
M " I think you're making a great mistake "
The car stops, Eleanor all smiles,
E " hello there, you got my message "
C " I am yours"
E " how very old world "
Carrot is standing just behind Catweazle.
E " I've been looking forward to this, thanks for sending your friend along Edward "
Ct " that's alright "
E " I am just mad about his face"
C " demand me anything "
E " oh how charming. Do hop on the back"
Catweazle clambers onto car , it's a two seater so he lays across back of car. Eleanor slowly drives off , Carrot runs back to the farm to get his bike.

 

[michaellevenson]

Eleanor and Maud take photos of Catweazle in the living room at their rented mansion. Poor Catweazle flinching as each photo is taken.
E " try not to flinch , it's only electronic flash. Let's have one of you smiling "
Catweazle tries to smile as the photo session goes on.
E " watch the birdie "
A little later they all sit on the settees, cups of tea laid out on the table, a chocolate cake on a plate.
E "I've been after you for since I first saw you, you've haunted me, and now I've laid your ghost as it were "
Catweazle looks at photos pinned up on a wooden easel like board, full of sadness in his face.
Maud is sniffing, her face showing her distaste for the smell emanating from Catweazle.
E " Maud you really should do something about your hayfever. And pour a little more milk for er....er.."
Touchwood the toad is on the table, Maud pours it a saucer of milk.
E " I haven't even asked you your name, what is it?"
C " what?"
E " your name "
C " Catweazle "
E " oh really, just Catweazle? (pointing at photos) I really think I've caught you haven't I "
C " aye"
E " Edward says you're a bit of a recluse. Here have some cake"
She offers the plate of chocolate cake , Catweazle takes takes it, looks disgustingly at it.
E " isn't it okay?"
C " I will obey thee"
E ( to Maud) " I think the old boy's a little deaf"
Catweazle bites into cake, actually it's not bad he scoffs it down, chocolate and cream over his face.

 

[michaellevenson]

Catweazle with Touchwood on his palm looks at photos almost whimpering.

Eleanor and Maud in the kitchen.
M " I think you've taken leave of your senses Eleanor "
E " whyever not if he really wants to help around the place . He seems such a dear, very eccentric of course, and isn't he sweet with that frog"
M " toad"
E " alright toad"
M " I think it's disgusting, if you ask me I think you're crazy to trust him"
E " he could do all sorts of things, might even help in the darkroom eventually, and he can sleep in Sir Henry's summer house "
They both go back to Catweazle.
E " well Mr Catweazle we've talked it over and I'm sure we can find plenty for you to do if you really want to help "
C " I am your slave "
E " oh that's so flattering isn't it Maud"
M " I suppose so, he never says anything else "
E " we'll have to pay you of course, what do you think will be fair?"
C " command me, I will obey"
E " you make me feel like Aladdin. How about two shillings an hour?" ( about £1.50 today)
Catweazle nods,
E " okay that's settled, now what is the first thing you could be doing"

 

[michaellevenson]

Carrot arrives at Mansion, he parks his bike around the side of the house, then pokes his head around the corner of the wall spying the front entrance. Eleanor, Maud and Catweazle come out, Catweazle carrying bucket of water. Eleanor points to car, Catweazle nods, she and Maud walk away to rear of house with their photographic equipment. Catweazle trudges up to car, stares at it , not knowing what to do. He then throws cloth onto front seat, then pours water into car, all over front seats, and then throws bucket on to the ground.
Carrot walks over.
Ct " what are you doing?"
C " spare yourself my brother, she has the enchanting box"
Ct " Catweazle you've got to stop acting like an idiot and pull yourself together "
C " I can't the hag has torn me apart "
Ct " eh?"
C " in many parts , pinned to the wall"
Ct " just because you've been photographed doesn't mean she owns you"
C " fly brother while there is still time"
Ct " if those photographs are worrying you why don't you just go in and get them "
C " I can do nothing I am a fly caught in her web"
Ct " alright I will, will that free you from her power?"
C " I know not"
Ct " you're useless Catweazle, absolutely useless "
C " aye"
Ct " listen, you keep a lookout while I'm in there, if it looks like they're coming back, press this here "
Carrot points to car horn button on steering
wheel.

 

[michaellevenson]

In living room Carrot goes up to photo board. He unpins each one, and takes the negatives that Eleanor also pinned to the board.
Outside Catweazle looks at horn button, puzzled by it, if he presses it Carrot will come out, how so ? A puzzle to him..curiosity gets the better of him...he presses it. The horn blares out, Catweazle puts fingers in ears, the noise won't stop .
Carrot hearing this panics, he runs out, knocking easel over, it crashes into table sending crockery everywhere.
Outside he thrusts photos into Catweazle's hands,
Ct " go go run ....you're free"
Catweazle runs off, the horn continues its blaring racket. Carrot gets out pen knife and sticks it into car horn button as Eleanor and Maud run up.
E " Edward what's happening "
Ct " car horn got stuck"
E " where's Mr Catweazle?"
Ct " oh ...er.. he's gone "
Maud looks shocked,
M " my prints!"
She runs into house,
E " gone where?"
Ct " he didn't say"
A scream is heard from inside house ,Maud runs back out.
E " what's happened "
M " I said he was mad, he's smashed the place up, taken my prints"
E " let's get after him"
M " he's dangerous Eleanor "
E " it's gonna take more than one crazy old man to scare me"
They get in car, and splosh into seats, and get very wet backsides.
M " aaarrrghhh......Eleanor !!"
E " stop moaning Maud"

They drive off. Catweazle meanwhile is running for dear life down road, he hears car and quickly runs behind tree, Eleanor and Maud drive passed. Catweazle foolishly steps back into road and sees car driving away and sticks tongue out at them.
Eleanor slams on the brakes.
E " it's him , I saw him in the mirror "
She reverses car and sees Catweazle running away through woods.
M " if you think I'm going into those woods after him you're as crazy as he is Eleanor "
Carrot turns up on bike,
Ct " where is he?"
E ( angry) " he's gone into the woods and I'm going to get your Pa". They drive off.

 

[michaellevenson]

Catweazle has arrived at Castle Saburac, his water tank home, he has photos in hand. He rips them up saying as he does,
C " good ridden thy midden, hag turn about, thus I thee rout. ( waving arms) SHEM PAMPARASH "
At that precise moment a tyre bursts on Eleanor's car. Magic or coincidence?
Catweazle climbs up into tank muttering.
C " I am hunted, used and abused"
He takes Touchwood out of his pocket and stares at toad.
C " we must return to our own time, I will not desert thee my trusted minion. Come I will prepare the magic"
Inside tank Catweazle stands by fire saying some incantation.
C "spirits of Earth Air Fire and Water bear me hence from this place. Salmy Dalmy Adonay"
He throws a handful of powder into fire , the flames roar higher.
Meanwhile Maud is replacing tyre on Eleanor's car, she jacks car up while Eleanor arms crossed watches doing nothing to help.
E " you're so slow Maud!"
Maud looks daggers at her boss, but carries on regardless, Maud must be paid well to put up with this bossiness.
Carrot bicycles up to Castle Saburac and climbs ladder into tank. Of Catweazle there is no sign.
THE END
Continued next episode

Next episode;

Catweazle Episode 7 - THE TELLING BONE ( SCENE BY SCENE)

Continuing from previous episode. A dispirited Carrot climbs into Catweazle's water tank home of Castle Saburac, no sign of him since he mysteriously vanished after the Mrs Derringer escapade ( s01e06). Ct " Catweazle? I know you're somewhere, you can't have magiced yourself into the past, it's...

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