Catweazle Episode 3 THE CURSE OF RAPKYN (NEW TRANSCRIPTION scene by scene)

michaellevenson

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In Hexwood farm, George Bennett and son, Carrot are at the breakfast table. Carrot is secretly dropping bits of toast on the floor feeding Beelzeebub, his pet tortoise.
C " here.."
George is reading the newspaper hears this,
G " what Carrot?"
C " nothing "
G " more tea?"
C " no thanks "
Carrot picks up the tortoise and puts it on the table, hidden behind a tea cosy.
George lifts the cosy and stares disbelieving,
G " what's that doing here?"
C " nothing much"
G " put in on the floor. "
C " just getting him used to me"
G " rather you did it somewhere else. Where an earth did you get it?"
C " Sam got it for me, he's name is Beelzeebub "
G " Beelzeebub?"
C " hmm...he's my familiar "
G " your what?"
C " my familiar, witches have them"
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In Castle Saburac, Catweazle is using a pestle and mortar to mix up a potion....meanwhile Carrot shows George a book he's got about witchcraft.
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C " it's a history of witchcraft, witches have familiars , they were sort of pets"
G " that's the latest craze is it?"
C " what d'you mean?"
G " magic....it was submarines last week "
C " it's jolly interesting "
G " it'd be nice if it worked. You could put a spell on Bill"
C " who's he?"
G " the bank manager, I've just had a very nasty letter from him about my overdraft "
Farmhand Sam enters kitchen.
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S " sorry to bother you Mr Bennett, I reckon some of those heifers have got cystitis."
G ( wearily) " right I'll have a look."
S " bit of bad luck , especially after all that trouble we had with rats."
G " yes, it's getting like the plagues of Egypt. It's almost as if there's a curse on the place"
C( excited) " curse?"
G ( to Sam) " we have a budding wizard in the family......for this week anyway, come on Sam"
George and Sam leave, Carrot thumbs through book to index.
C " Caves...cults...ah..curses.....(reads ) the power of the evil eye..gosh...secret names were used to call up demons to destroy enemies. ( to tortoise) what d'you think Be-elzy? I bet Catweazle knows all about curses."
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In Castle Saburac, the water tank home of Catweazle, he has finished mixing his potion as Carrot climbs down into tank.
C " do you know anything about curses?"
CW " aye boy, I had them all in my book. Curses for everything, curses that will chill thy blood"
C " what book?"
CW " my magic book ( sadly), 900 years ago "
C " don't start that again, if our farm's got a curse on it can you uncurse it?"
CW " show me the curse and I will vanquish it."
C " don't know where to start....STUFFY!....Stuffy Gladstone, he runs the local museum. If Hexwood has a curse on it he can look it up. That place of his is full of old books."
Catweazle looks hopefully and smiles,
CW " old books ! Mayhap magic books"

Carrot runs off to the museum, Catweazle a little way behind. A country lane runs through the woods, Catweazle comes to it, and stops in awe, he sees a road marking on the road as the lane bends, it reads 'SLOW'. Bending down Catweazle studies the to him mysterious letters.
CW " tis a magic sign."
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A car horn is heard, Catweazle jumps up in fear, a car passes down the lane, the occupants staring at him waving.
Catweazle waves back and laughs,
CW " swifter than the wild boar, and men sit inside them. Now all are magicians "

Carrot arrives at a gated mansion just outside the nearby village of Westbourne. The sign on the gate says, " Old Westbourne House and Folk Museum "
Inside, the curator Gladstone is addressing a group of schoolgirls, listening to his talk, including their stern looking lady teacher.
Gl " can you all see?"
Girls " yes Mister Gladstone "
Gladstone has a small statuette in front of him on the table. It's supposed to be two faced, unfortunately the head of this very old grey stone statuette is damaged and only one face remains.
Gl " Serranus the Romans called him, an ancient fertility god."
The schoolgirls titter and giggle, their teacher looks sternly at them.
Gl " originally had two faces, one on each side like Janus. Unfortunately one of them is missing. We're lucky to have him at all really, belongs to the British Museum. Professor Bonington arranged the loan. He's coming today to take him back to London."
The teacher notices one of her charges chewing.
Teacher ( sternly) " what are you eating?"
Gladstone looks up from the statuette and nervously stammers,
Gl " er....nothing nothing at all."
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Meanwhile Carrot enters passing in the hallway of the museum a suit of armour, 1066 Norman armour, Catweazle has arrived at the gates outside and walks up the gravel driveway towards the front door.
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michaellevenson

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Carrot approaches Mr Gladstone as the girls and their teacher move off to wonder around the museum looking at various displays.
C " Mr Gladstone?"
Gl " yes"
C " I wonder if you can help me?"
Gl " well I will if I can "
C " my name is Edward Bennett from Hexwood Farm"
Gl " Hexwood farm, oh yes, that's partly 17th century, nice old place"
C " I'm doing this history project, and I thought I might as well do it about my home"
Gl " splendid, good idea"
C " I remember that interesting talk you did at school"
Gl " oh that's rather encouraging, I rather thought I'd laid a bit of an egg"
C " no....no"
Meanwhile in foyer of museum Catweazle gingerly enters, and sees the armoured figure standing, a mannequin of course,but Catweazle after tapping it to see it's a fake joyfully kicks it over.
CW ( laughing)" Ha ha, death to the Norman invaders"
Gladstone and Carrot run out on hearing the crash.
Gl ( angry) " did you touch the exhibit?"
C " I'm sure he didn't Mr Gladstone. "
Gl " you know this gentleman?"
C " er....yes, he's staying at the farm aren't you...er..Mr Brown?"
Catweazle looks sheepishly.

Meanwhile at the farm George Bennett is on the phone to his bank manager.
G " I see....when can I come and see you?"
Stern voice on phone, " this afternoon 3.30, it really is very pressing , you are £800 over your limit"
G " okay see you at 3.30...( phone down)...oh no, £800. ( Calling) Sam...Sam.."
Sam comes to hallway.
S " yes Mr Bennett "
G " erm...when you've got a moment get the steps will you, and have a look at the fuse box, some of the upstairs lights seem to be on the blink"

Back at the museum, Gladstone has righted the fallen armoured soldier display with Carrot's help.
Gl " no damage done, after all he was used to being biffed about wasn't he Mr Brown?"
Catweazle has disappeared,
Gl " he's a bit odd isn't he? Why does he wear that robe?"
C " well you see, he's worn it for years"
Gl " I wonder where he's got to."
 

michaellevenson

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Suddenly whistling can be heard, Catweazle is on all fours crawling around floor whistling.
C " what are you doing ?"
CW " I've lost him"
C " you haven't brought Touchwood have you?"
CW " he wanted to come"
C " you'll get us thrown out, he already thinks you're potty"
CW ( whistling)....come my boy, my merry boy."
Gladstone comes up," he really is very odd, what's he looking for?"
Suddenly screams are heard, the schoolgirls and their teacher, as Touchwood hops about among them.
Catweazle stands and runs towards the hubbub.
C " I think he's found it."
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Catweazle grabs Touchwood as the school party run out of museum.
Gladstone looks flustered,
Gl, " a frog?"
CW " tis a toad"
Gladstone regains a bit of composure.
Gl " where was I? Oh yes Hexwood. Tobias history of Westbourne is what we want."
Gladstone leads Carrot over to bookcase, Catweazle follows, stops in awe at the statuette and covers his eyes.
CW " Serranus, cast not thy eye upon me."
Gladstone has found the book he wanted and opens page about Hexwood.
Gl " here we are, ( reading), the new house at Hexwood has a pleasant aspect. One Rapkyn it is said, bound all who lived there in turmoil. But that is for the foolish. Well, that's all there is on Hexwood I'm afraid. "
C " bound all living there in turmoil? What does it mean?"
Gl " Tobias is often rather obscure I'm afraid."
Catweazle has been listening,
CW " thou flipperty gibbet, it is clear as spring water. That Rapkyn was a witch."
Gl " really Mr Brown how can you possibly know that?"
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Catweazle has heaved himself up side of bookcase to reach top shelf, standing on lower shelf, he takes out Adamcos his knife and seems to be searching for a book, pointing knife at books. One by one he grabs a book and throws it to the floor, causing Gladstone some consternation.
Gl " Mr Brown I rather you didn't do that."
More books are hurled to floor, Gladstone getting very anxious.
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Gl "Mr Brown, the books are valuable."
Catweazle has found what he wants, climbs down with book in hand.
CW " my search is over....Rapkyn's book. The true power, the magic is within"
Catweazle calmly walks out with book.
C " don't worry Mr Gladstone I'll get it back"

Catweazle is in Castle Saburac marvelling at the book he has just acquired.
CW " enchanting, flying, disappearing spells, charms, curses, it is all here Touchwood. "
Carrot climbs down into tank.
C " come on hand it over"
CW " what?"
C " the book"
CW " it stays here with me in Castle Saburac."
C " it goes back to Stuffy Gladstone."
Catweazle looks deeply into Carrot's eyes and hypnotically says,
CW " cross me not my brother it stays here."
Carrot momentarily feels a bit sleepy, then snaps out of it.
C " now listen Catweazle."
CW " I have found thy curse...see the runes"
C " I can't read that"
CW " and I can't read thy scribble. Hark, Hexwood I blight thee, stones hold my power. One in the water, one in the tower."
C " sorry, I don't get it."
CW " thy mogwob! Stones hold thy power"
C " what stones?"
CW, " the stones this Rapkyn cursed and then hid."
C " why did he do that?"
CW " was his revenge my brother, he cursed them because thy house was built on his witches meeting place. He hid them to stop meddlers undoing his curse."
C " you mean, we've got to find a couple of stones hidden somewhere on the farm?"
CW " aye brother."
 
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michaellevenson

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Carrot and Catweazle enter kitchen, there's a note on the kitchen table, Carrot reads it.
C " it's from Dad, we'll have to work fast, he'll be back at 6"
Suddenly a cuckoo noise is heard, a little wooden cuckoo pops out of the wall clock.
Cuckoo is angered,
CW " release him!"
C " eh?"
CW " release the tiny cuckoo "
C " it's not a real one, listen Catweazle we've got to find this stone. "
They go into the living room.
C " one in the water, and one in the tower. But we haven't got a tower, what can he mean?"
Carrot is actually standing by the fireplace, and has a revelation.
C " the chimney perhaps he means the chimney."
Carrot peers up the dark chimney,
C "if it's up there we'll never find it"
CW " we must"
C " okay"
Carrot grabs hold of metal firegrate,
C " help me with this"
CW " what is it?"
C " never mind"
The two of them remove grate from bottom of chimney. Carrot then fetches a step ladder, and places it under chimney.
C " up you go"
CW " no"
C " don't worry it's not full of soot."
Catweazle shakes head vigorously,
C " why not?"
CW " there may be demons"
C " you think so?"
CW " yes"
C " alright, you hold the ladder"
CW( relieved) " ahh.."
Carrot climbs up steps into chimney.
C " what sort of stone am I looking for?"
CW " it'll have an eye on it"
Carrot descends,
C " this is hopeless, we'll never find it, I don't think there is one."
CW ( dismissively) " bah ! frogspawn"
Catweazle climbs gingerly up steps into chimney.
C " any demons?"
CW " not yet Nettleface"
C " if you want to go higher there's a sort of foothold."
CW " no need, it is here, I have found the stone."
C " hang on I'll get a hammer and chisel."
Carrot runs out , then back in a minute or so later with the tools, only to see Sam has entered room.
S " hello Carrot."
C " er...hello (loud) Sam, nice to see you SAM"
S " no need to yell, I'm not deaf. Have you seen the steps?"
C " what steps?"
S ( pointing) " those steps"
C " well you can't have them"
S " who said?"
C " I need them"
S " what for?"
C " it's a secret"
S " don't be daft"
Catweazle lifts himself quietly off steps and further up chimney as Sam takes step and leaves.
Carrot peers up chimney,
C " come down quick"
Soot rushes down chimney followed with a thud by Catweazle and more soot.
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Catweazle covered in soot holding stone.
CW ( mocking) " NO soot!? No soot!? I am like Shembartimof, black demon of the moon."
C " did you have to do that, look at the mess everywhere"
C " here , take the accursed stone"
Carrot studies dirty soot covered lump of stone.
C " are you sure this is it?"
CW ( angry) " WHAT !"
C " okay okay, let's give it a wash, and you while we're at it."
 
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michaellevenson

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After cleaning stone, Carrot is in living room using a magnifying glass to study it.
C " it's ever so old, come and have a look."
Carrot doesn't know Sam has entered behind him carrying steps.
C " what does the runes say old Master "
S " eh?"
Carrot turns,
C " SAM!"
S " what's that old bit of stone?"
C " it's only a game Sam, witchcraft."
Catweazle enters and hurriedly, quietly departs for kitchen, Carrot sees this behind Sam, who heads off now towards kitchen.
C " where you going?"
S " to put the steps back."
C ( alarmed) " don't do that! I mean I'll do that."
Sam sees black soot all over carpet.
S " what's all this mess, you been up the chimney?"
C " not right up."
S " you won't half get it in the neck when your dad comes back. Okay I'm off."
Sam leaves , Catweazle comes back in,
CW " in and out like a weaver's shuttle."
C " nearly got caught that time. One in the water, one in the tower. One in the water?"
CW " has thou a well?"
C " brilliant!"

Outside Carrot and Catweazle look down the farm well.
C " looks a long way down, but there's only a bit of water at the bottom. Sure you'll be alright?"
CW " I ?! I am not going down."
C " oh go on, it'll be fun."
CW " I have the bone ache."
C " that's a poor excuse, get in the bucket."
CW " art thou afraid?"
C " yes"
CW " ah....Tut Tut Tut "
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Catweazle reluctantly climbs into bucket, Carrot unwinds rope, the bucket descends.
CW " slowly Nettleface "
C " can you see anything yet?"
CW " not yet....WAIT"
C (alarmed) " what?!"
Carrot in his eagerness to see down well lets go of rope. The bucket speeds to the bottom of well.
C " Catweazle...Catweazle..( croaking heard)...
Touchwood is he okay? Can you see the stone?"
CW ( from very bottom of well) " no, many little stars but no stone."
C " it must be down there somewhere."
CW " I cannot find it "
C " don't give up."
CW " tis dark, come lift me"
C " we've got to find it Catweazle."
CW " I am cold, lift me thy woodlouse."
C " okay get in the bucket."
Carrot winds up rope, bucket lifts.
CW " take care, take care "
C " stop moaning "
CW " slowly my brother."
C " don't worry, well at least we tried."
The bucket reaches the top, Catweazle is holding something.
CW " see, the stone"
C " great!"
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Again Carrot in his enthusiasm lets go of rope, bucket crashes back down.
CW " aaarrghhh......"
Later back indoors, the second stone is washed. The two stones fit together, previously one piece. Carved into the joined pieces is a face. The missing face of the statuette Serranus. They go to Stuffy Gladstone at the museum.
 
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michaellevenson

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At the museum Gladstone has placed the two pieces on the statuette, completing the two faced Serranus.
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Gl " incredible, absolutely incredible, it fits, you see it all fits. Put the tape on , nice and tight."
Carrot holding packing tape, tapes the two pieces to the rest of the statuette.
Gl " you know Edward this really is a find in a million "
C " sorry I haven't got your book back yet"
Gl " oh, keep it, keep it, wait till old Bonington sees this "
C " I can't stay I've got to get back to the house, left it in a bit of a mess."

Back at the house Carrot is clearing up the mess, his dad George perplexed by this behaviour.
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G ( raised voice) " this is completely irresponsible and childish behaviour. The moment I'm out the house you're doing a mad thing like climbing the chimney."
C " I know it looks bad, but I had a good reason "
G " don't answer back, you're getting completely out of control Carrot."
The phone rings in the hallway, George storms out to answer it.
G ( phone) " Hexwood farm"
Gl " it's Gladstone here"
G " who?"
Gl " Cecil Gladstone, Westbourne museum, is that Mr Bennett?"
G " yes"
Gl " I suppose your Edward has told you about his amazing discoveries"
G " no , what amazing discoveries?"
Gl " missing pieces of the statue Serranus. He found them at the farm apparently."
Sitting next to Gladstone at the museum is an earnest looking gentleman, Professor Bonington.
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Gl " I have Professor Bonington here now, Roman Britain, British Museum you know. There's no doubt his department will make you an offer. I will say in the region of £800"
G ( shocked) " what?!"
Gl " possibly more, is it alright to keep them here?"
G " I suppose so"
Gl " splendid, you'll be hearing direct from the British Museum, goodbye. "
George puts the phone down stunned.
G ( to himself) " £800!"
George runs back to Carrot all smiles.
G " Carrot, what an earth did you find?"

At Castle Saburac Catweazle is thumbing through Rapkyn's book, he turns to Touchwood ,
CW " this Rapkyn was a master, its all within these pages Touchwood, here is our way back."

Cast;
George Bennett....Bud Tingwell
Carrot.....Robin Davies
Catweazle......Geoffrey Bayldon
Sam......Neil Mccarthy
Gladstone.....Peter Sallis

Next episode;
 
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